When Quiet Exhaustion Starts to Feel Like Hopelessness
- Nada Johnson
- Jan 8
- 5 min read
Updated: Jan 13
Understanding how stress & life transitions can quietly increase emotional risk, & why support matters sooner rather than later
Quiet exhaustion does not always look like a crisis.
For many high-achieving women of colour and Black women, emotional overload builds silently over time. You are capable, dependable, and used to being “the strong one.” You manage demanding careers, visibility pressures, family expectations, and the ongoing stress of navigating spaces where you feel you must stay composed and competent.
From the outside, life may look “fine.” Internally, however, emotional overload and a deep tiredness can grow in ways that are hard to name, and even harder to explain.
This is not a weakness. It is what can happen when chronic stress becomes a constant state.
✨ When Stress Stops Feeling Temporary
The American Psychological Association explains that stress affects many systems in the body, including the nervous, cardiovascular, gastrointestinal, and musculoskeletal systems. Our bodies can handle stress in small doses, but when stress becomes long-term or chronic, it can create serious strain over time. (American Psychological Association, n.d.).
Many women describe this as:
🌫️ persistent tension in the body
🌫️ feeling “on” all the time
🌫️ exhaustion that rest does not fix
🌫️ gut discomfort, sleep disruption, headaches, or irritability
🌫️ emotional numbness or a quiet loss of motivation
This is often what quiet exhaustion looks like when you have been carrying too much alone.
✨ The Stressors That Add Up
Emotional risk rarely comes from one single thing. For many high-achieving women, it is the layering of stressors over time, including:
✔️ Chronic workplace stress and high responsibility
✔️ Pressure to overperform and manage perception
✔️ Imposter syndrome and persistent self-doubt
✔️ Family conflict, especially mother–daughter or adult sibling dynamics
✔️ Cultural expectations to remain strong, silent, or self-sacrificing
✔️ Major life transitions layered onto existing stress, such as marriage, pregnancy, separation, divorce, grief, or the loss of a parent, partner, spouse, or loved one
When multiple demands exist at once, it becomes harder to recover emotionally. Many women continue functioning, but feel internally depleted.
✨ When Hopelessness Appears Quietly
As emotional overload accumulates, some women notice a shift.
They are still showing up, still achieving, still supporting others, but internally they feel less connected to hope. The heaviness begins to feel different.
The Centre for Addiction and Mental Health notes that people often experience suicidal thoughts when they feel they have lost hope and feel helpless, wanting their pain to end. (Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, n.d.).
It is important to name this clearly, with compassion:
Suicidal thoughts are signals of overwhelm, not personal failure.
They are understandable responses to sustained stress and emotional depletion.
These thoughts can be especially confusing for high-achieving women because they often appear quietly, without outward signs.
They may show up as:
🌫️ “I do not know how much longer I can carry this.”
🌫️ “I feel stuck.”
🌫️ “I just want relief from how heavy everything feels.”
If you relate to this, you are not alone, and you are not broken. This is a sign that support is needed sooner rather than later.
CAMH also emphasizes something crucial and hopeful: suicide can be prevented, and many people recover from suicidal thoughts and go on to live full and meaningful lives. (Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, n.d.).
✨ Why High-Achieving Women Often Delay Support
Many women delay reaching out because:
🪞 they are used to coping alone
🪞 they worry they will be judged or misunderstood
🪞 they tell themselves it is not “bad enough”
🪞 they feel responsible for holding everything together
But functioning is not the same as being well.
The Mental Health Commission of Canada emphasizes that suicide is a serious public health issue, and that programs and strategies exist that can make a difference. (Mental Health Commission of Canada, n.d.).
Support is not only for moments of crisis. Support is protective.
✨ Support Earlier, Not Later
At NJCCS, therapy is not framed as a last resort.
It is a culturally responsive, trauma-informed space where women can slow down, speak honestly, and explore what they have been carrying, without having to explain, justify, or minimize their experiences.
In therapy, women often begin to:
🌿 recognize early signals of emotional overload
🌿 understand how sustained stress has affected their body and mind
🌿 process grief, loss, and life transitions with care
🌿 release the pressure to always be “the strong one”
🌿 rebuild clarity, confidence, and emotional balance
🌿 feel supported before distress deepens
Support does not take away strength. It helps restore it.
✨ A Gentle Invitation
If quiet exhaustion has started to feel heavier, or if you have been carrying emotional overload and hope feels harder to reach, support is available.
I offer a warm, thoughtful, and steady space where clients often share that they feel deeply supported, understood, and held with care. My approach is collaborative, grounded, and paced with respect for your story and your nervous system.
You are welcome to book a free 10-minute consultation to see if this support feels like the right fit.
You do not have to carry this alone.
With warmth,
Nada Johnson, MSW, RSW
Registered Social Worker, Psychotherapist / trained Family Mediator / EMDR Trained Therapist / Certified Racial Trauma Clinician / Mental Health & Sexual Violence Consultant / Professional Speaker
🌍 Website: www.nadajohnsonservices.com
📩 Contact: info@nadajohnsonservices.com
Nada Johnson Consulting & Counselling Services – Online phone and video sessions available
Village Healing Centre: 240 Roncesvalles Avenue
Please share this post to support another woman who may be quietly carrying too much alone. 🤝
References
American Psychological Association. (n.d.). Stress effects on the body. https://www.apa.org/topics/stress/body
Centre for Addiction and Mental Health. (n.d.). Suicide. https://www.camh.ca/en/health-info/mental-illness-and-addiction-index/suicide
Mental Health Commission of Canada. (n.d.). Hope Blooms: Suicide prevention initiatives. https://mentalhealthcommission.ca
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